Absence makes the heart grow fonder, unless you are the manager of the Badgers, in which case it means another swoop into the loan market. So it was, with two new signings hidden up his sleeves, that Badgers Manager Ben Wheatland assembled his team to give his team talk.
Facing up against 'Dench Elephants', a team who had handed the Badgers a 5-1 thrashing last season, there was a determination amongst the squad to redeem themselves. Tension was rife amongst the players before kick off, and this was heightened when a fan squeezed himself through the outdated turnstiles in the Panteli Stand. This was a huge positive for the Badgers, as their performances on the pitch were finally being rewarded with a rise in gate receipts, something that Badgers' economic analysts had been predicting for some time.
After a brief tactical analysis of the situation, Wheatland unveiled the two newest Badgers. Dan Hough was immediately slotted in to the defence, covering for both Tom Marshall and George Tomlin, who were absent. The other new addition, Ady Platt, replaced Ben Himpe in midfield, alongside Charlie Dutton. This was a controversial call, being that Himpe wasn't actually absent. However, Wheatland was about to drop another bomb shell as he announced that, for the first time in living memory, he wasn't starting himself. Reeling from the shock of this omission the team took to the field, with Himpe leading the line.
This tactical gamble paid off within 42 seconds, as Himpe held the ball up well on the edge of the Elephants' box, before laying the ball off to Platt, who smashed home. This goal was significant as being the fastest goal a Badger has ever scored, and also put Platt's name amongst a small amount of players who have scored on their Badgers' debut.
From here, the Badgers continually confounded the form book. The Elephants, sitting second in the table, were given the run around by their industrious opponents, as the Badgers settled quickly in to their fabled passing game. The experience Hough brought to the team at the back was clear, and his influence at the back, alongside Ben Brazier, kept all Elephant attacks at bay.
The football on show was of the highest quality, and the fan could be heard to chant "It's just like watching Brazil!". Clearly the Badgers' fans have not lost their ironic humour.
The Badgers continually pressed their opponents, looking for a killer second goal. However it proved to be beyond them, as Ben Wheatland (on for Himpe) fired straight at the keeper, and Dan Hough sidefooted over. Hough is currently facing a fine as the ball has not yet been seen re-entering the Earth's atmosphere, and is therefore presumed lost.
Goalkeeper Dan Roberts had very little to do in the first half, due to the Badgers' dominance, but he did see some action in the final minute of the half. A long range shot somehow squirmed its way beneath him, in what was the Elephants' first shot on target. However, immediately after kick off, Roberts made a sensational save to deny a quickfire second goal, and he was clearly inspired to make up for his earlier mistake.
At half time, yet again drawing, Wheatland urged his troops to go forward in search of a winner. The early stages of the second half began badly for the Badgers. With all of the game being played in their half, Himpe had to come back and help out in defence. The Badgers were very much under the cosh, and Roberts was able to more than make up for the goal he let in. Stunning dives to his left and right saw shots tipped wide as the game briefly became Roberts vs. Dench Elephants. However the Badgers saw out this siege, and started their own attacks.
Macca's mazy run, through about 5 players, finally saw him get a shot away, but it was easily saved. Wheatland's running was starting to create chances as well, when a cut back from a long ball by Hough fell to Dutton on the edge of the area. However, with the goal gaping wide, Dutton could only scuff his chance wide, and the game seemed to be inevitably heading towards another draw.
Ady Platt was having none of this though, and he continually drove the team forward. And so, when a Macca shot was deflected, Platt was on hand to smash home the rebound. The goal sparked delerium in the stands and amongst the players, who were now just a few minutes away from winning their first game of the season. There was still time for Wheatland to miss a one-on-one (as is becoming tradition), and still time for Roberts to make another fantastic save. However, as the Elephants made one final attack, the whistle blew for full time, and the Badgers had won!
