The Badgers were looking to improve on their last outing, hoping to throw off the hangover (literally in some cases) from last season to avoid a bottom placed finish in the table. However, news wasn't encouraging, with inspirational captain Sam "Psycho" Hamberger missing out with an ankle injury and a serious case of "HOLYCOWIHAVETWOESSAYSTOWRITE-itis", something that has plagued Hamberger's career thus far. Despite this, Hamberger was seen before the game signing autographs for fans, and exchanging last-minute essay tips with his One-Third Manager, Tony Breslin. However, good news came in the shape of the return of Paddy Bolton from illness, and The Badgers sensed that things could go well and that they could register their first win of the season. The fans clearly did not share the team's optimism, with a dissapointing zero flocking through the turnstiles. Chairman Ben Wheatland was heard to suggest to his management team that if gates stayed low, the playing budget would have to be slashed to cope with the troubled financial times, meaning that the highest paid players at the club may have to leave. Wheatland suggested in an interview during the week that star Bobby Radebe may have to leave or risk taking a pay cut on his £180,000 a week wage.
Steam Team clearly hadn't read the script however, and came at The Badgers in the opening exchanges with intent. Despite this, The Badgers fought and battled harder than in recent games, looking dangerous on the counter and solid at the back, marshalled by the solid foundations of Rob Weeks and Josh Staniforth. In the first half, the closest The Badgers came to goals came from the vision and movement of Paddy Bolton and Charlie Carter, with Carter taking a long range effort that glanced narrowly wide. In his post-match interview, Carter launched into a stream of expletives when mocked by gathered journalists that his effort wasn't up to the standard of Sam Hamberger's long-range goal of last season. Carter has reportedly consulted his legal team regarding a super-injunction over the incident, as well as hiss alleged affair with Imogen Thomas. If the allegations are correct, it will make Carter the best footballer ever to have slept with her.
The only other higlight of the first half was the comedy of errors that is Ben Wheatland and Bobby Radebe. Radebe, running with the ball, had numerous options to his left (Paddy "Fucking give me the ball!!!" Bolton and Charlie "In more space than the bloke who farted at a club" Carter to the right), but chose not to pass, instead opting to barge into Ben Wheatland, who could do nothing but apologise profusely for the remainder of the half.
The half time team talk ended with a plea from Paddy to "not let this end 2-0 to them after such a good effort".
The second half was as controversial as the first half was boring. Soon after the restart, Steam Team won a corner, and as Badgers made a substitution, took it, taking advantage of a pack of confused Badgers. They of course scored, which was mighty harsh on The Badgers who had been looking more dangerous this half, but despite their protests, the goal was allowed to stand. One anonymous Badger was heard to mutter that "this is what you get when there is no referee...".
The injustice of this event galvanised The Badgers, and from the kick off, neat interchange between Josh Staniforth and Ben Wheatland saw them win a corner. Taken short, the ball fell to Staniforth, who calmly teed Wheatland up to slot the ball into the bottom corner. The equaliser had clearly shocked Steam Team, who spent the next few minutes under pressure, and it seemed increasingly likely that The Badgers would now push on and win the game.
However, as the weather of Britain continually proves, dissapointment is always just around the corner. As it was, it was from a corner that Steam Team scored their next controversial goal, with the striker seeming to get his shot away from inside the area. Josh Staniforth lead the Badgers' protests, correctly pointing out that from his position inside the area, he had a very good view of the incident. This wasn't enough though, and yet again, the fact that there was no referee shagged up The Badgers' game.
The Badger's pushed harder in the dying seconds, but were finally undone by a truly alright goal from Steam Team, as the striker confounded the entire Badgers defence before slotting home.
Dissapointing isn't the word.
