Home friendly match played on 28 February 2016.
Kicked off at 10:30 AM

STC welcomed Baltic to STC after Lee managed to arrange a fixture at the last minute to fill our vacancy. Well done Lee.

On arrival, it was confirmed that the pitch had dried out well and had even be rolled so the expectant crowd of 1, Mick was eagerly anticipating a 90 minute display of the beautiful game. Well you can anticipate all you like, but in reality this proved to be a clichéd, game of 2 halves with the conditions winning out and both sides not being able to make their turn, backed by the wind, tell.

Missing both of the balcony boys, it was left to Roberts and Medium to select the side. Jordan between the sticks, Deano right back, Bilbo left, Rob and Templeton Peck in the middle, Sicknote left, Gok right, Pinky and Perky in the middle with Roberts and Crabby up front, with Pete and little Scott on the bench.

This truly was a game of 2 halves. STC started with the wind on their backs and looked by the far the better side and really should have been 4 up before half time. With Deano having an opening 5 minutes to forget, clearly struggling to hide his hangover, it took until the 25th minute before they took the lead. Gok won a loose ball and Crabby picked up on the defensive error and finished well. 1-0 STC.

With STC piling on the pressure Crabby should have doubled the lead but struck a sweet volley straight at the keeper when anywhere else and it was a goal. Medium Scott was enjoying time on the ball in the middle and there was also a notable moment when newbee Pete dropped the shoulder out left and put in a peach of ball but no one was on the end of it. The only other real chance of the half fell to Sheggs who could only airkick.

So an uneventful first 45, STC cruising and should have already out the game to bed.

With the turnaround and now FACING the wind, STC struggled. Throughout the half, STC were dropping deeper and deeper and were being overrun down both flanks and throughout the midfield, with the loss of Hooky to injury compounding the matter. STC were repelling attach after attach in what resembled the Alamo, with a number of last gasp interventions preventing the equaliser, combined with some questionable finishing form the opposition. However with time running out, the equaliser came, poor marking and a lack of tracking enabled the Baltic midfielder to strike into the top corner from the edge of the box leaving Jordan with no chance. 1-1

2 minutes later and a moment of madness from Jordan. With Joe Dolce shouting go long go long, Jordan decided to roll the ball out on the edge of the box to which Slim could only toe poke away for a throw. Go long means punt the thing in any language, but STC got away with it.

With a minute left on the clock, Rob brought down the opposing number of the ten on the edge of the box. With cries of a penalty as the number 10 fell into the box, Slim took it upon himself to call the individual a cheating cu@t. What transpired then was comedy for everyone and the source of ridicule in the bar for Slim. The Number 10 palmed Slim in the FACE, yes the FACE, not the arm, shoulder or head but FACE, yes the FACE and as Slim decided to state on numerous occasions, you don’t TOUCH HIS FACE. With Slim ready to burst, a comedy moment as described by Scott in the bar after when the opposition forward stated ‘it’s that 26 who causes everything (Rob), he kicks everyone and then runs away’, pure gold. BUT that still does not take away from the fact that Slim is not to be touched in the FACE. Face the final frontier, these are the voyages of the dumb fuck SlimFACE who threw his toys out of the forward FACING pram, for all to see and put a smile on everyone’s FACE.

All in all a disappointing 2nd half but a fair result on the day. 1-1. A strong performance 1st half, poor second, injury scares for Hooky and Pete with Slim’don’t toucha my Face’ voted Man of the match in the bar for a towering rearguard display, until the FACE off in the dying minutes.

Away next week to Farnborough where STC will want to banish the memories of the defeat from 10 days ago.

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