Home cup match played on 05 November 2011.
Kicked off at 2:00 PM

Team News

Walderslade had the usual suspects missing in M.Beetlestone (is he still alive?) and 'Pato the ballerina' Tille (injury or revision?) along with Rob Darby's whereabouts unknown. The Slade have plumped for a change of formation with 1 up top and 1 just behind floating, with Coney being the lone ranger and Armour supporting. Sammy Beetlestone moves up to left wing, in which was otherwise the usual defensive and midfield line up. All we knew about Collyers was that they came second in Division 2 the previous year and were high up the table in Divison 1, so a tricky game was definitely in store...

First Half

Following on from last weeks quick out of the blocks beginning, the Slade pushed for the opening goals, creating space and pushing the oppositon back. Beetlestone was flying down the left, Coney was holding the ball up (surprisingly) well, showing some neat touches. Harris and Marques were dictating in the middle, wiinning the first and second balls, linking up with Armour to good effect. Chances fell to Armour, Beetlestone, Coney and Pierce who was denied by a great save, yet it was Marques who stumbled and squeeled when presented with a chance on the edge of the box and duly fell over instead of doing what any normal person would of done and actually had a shot. Nevermind, with the blue boys bossing the game, it was a cross that led to the opening goal of the game that was flicked on by an excellent man mountain and defensive stallion and definitely not shark like Lee Pierce (he moans he doesn't get enough praise) who found captain Sammy to nod home from a few yards out. 1-0 Walderslade and definitely deserved. Half Time

Second Half

The second half saw the Salde having to dig deep and defend their fair share of corners but defended superbly with Warner, O'Brien and Lewis making solid tackles every 5 minutes. None more so than Lee Pierce who's display was beginning to border on world class and back up his statement of thinking he's the best player in the team. With Walderslade not finding as much space as the first half when Coney and Armour had numerous chances, it was down to long range shots, coming from Harris and Coney to try to double the Saldes lead. Now we have been following O'B's scream watch but today there was no screaming from the lanky 'ugly' 'f*** your mum' O'Brien, the screaming come from Harris, who picked up the D.O.D award for a late challenge that left him gasping for breath and shedding the odd tear or two. Not to worry though, he's a soldier and at least we all know he's gonna challenge the morals of dick of the day once he gets his dirty, whenever he decides to have it that is...Back on with the game, and just before the end of the game, a sublime Ticehurst through ball put Ben Lewis on his way and from the half way line he shat himself all the way to the goal (from the oncoming fat c*** 'chasing' him down, evntually scuffing, sorry slotting the ball home to make it 2-0 to the Slade. This was followed by a wild celebration (from the shuffler Rodger who decided that they were all c*** and shouted have that you fuckin c****, repeating this a good 3 times). What an hard bastard, especially when you add to that he got his first yellow card for the slade. Thug like behaviour from Roddy. There was just about enough time for Rossy to get called a fat bastard. Standard. Final Score Walderslade 2-0 Collyers FC

Match Analysis

A battling performace from everyone out there with even Callum Rodger tracking back and matching a slide challenge. Congratulations to Lee Pierce on an impressive performance that got him his man of the match award (somewhow)... Bu seriously, another well done to the defence, including sharkey, who kept their fourth clean sheet in a row, with Harris holding, just in front of them and performing the role superbly. The change of formation created chances for the Slade and Collyers didnt know how to deal with it, especially in the first half with Armour finding space and chances that he should have added to his 4 goals. Overall, an excellent Kent Cup victory, but let's crack on with the rest of the season starting with Division 4 O'Connells this Saturday.

SladeSladeSladeSladeSladeSladeSlade !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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