Andy Walters and his Huyton Consortium were in the stands today as social media was awash with stories of a hostile takeover of the BSFC. But Lech Hedges players showed their Solidarnosc for their manager as they brought the Capitalist Roaders of Rhein to their knees!!
The Economistas started slower than Sammy McSnail stuck down a Siberian salt mine!! After 10 minutes Carl Karloff tumbled backwards like Topsy more dazed and confused than Wolgang Gunther on an episode of Countdown. Meanwhile Paul 'Catanachio' Brady was Missing in Action!. Ender Bedingi Sotoli in his last game before Theresa May deports him back to Gabon ran through and slotted past the hapless Hagrid Wallace in goal!! RHEIN 1 - BUSINESS SCHOOL 0 !!! Further calamity ensued as Hagrid went down in the box and far far away an Avalanche fell in Abruzzo! Players gathered round in profound solemnity to give Wallace the last rites except for Farrer who appeared from nowhere with gloves on and a smile wider than a Cheshire Cat!! Rhein thought they were back on the milk train after a shock win at Little Heath Arena back in December! But they hadn't reckoned for Leighton 'Claggy' Baines rallying the troops in a virtuoso performance at left back reminiscent of Maldini for the Rossineri. Bibby Bibsta ran riot down the right wing striking back with a clinical finish into the bottom right of the net!! RHEIN 1 - BUSINESS 1 !! Muzza Man Murray then brought his A game into play lashing home from inside the box to make it 2-1 as a roar went round the away end! The Bibsta then scored the goal of the game with a divine chip over the enemy keeper!! But still Hedges demanded more from his protégé like Boris Lermontov beseeching his Prima Ballerina in the 'Red Shoes'!! Man of the Match Kevey Carlisle was playing like a centre forward from a bygone era when players travelled to the game on the 79 bus sharing a woodbine and a pale ale on the top deck with fans. A fine performance was topped off with a Tom Finneyesque rocket into the top corner!! This was an old school Rout! HALF TIME - RHEIN 1 - BUSINESS 4!!!
Hedges took off Karloff at half time as his head was mashed from tactical overload!!! His replacement Ma Larkin came on but was soon blowing like the Fat Controller in Thomas the Tank and the Runaway Train SEASON 3 EPISODE 4! Mitchell got knocked oot from a header by his teammate Din and McLean began veering all over the pitch like a Dementia patient lost on the Gynae ward! the pitch began to churn up like Agincourt as First Harrison butted heads like a Rutting Stag and then Karloff put his opposite number down in a chokeslam!! Rhein's keeper went route one to Sotoli and two goals followed. Arg deux Farrer slipped for the first and went down for the second like Moby Dick floundering on Formby beach!!! The ref blew his whistle - FINAL SCORE - RHEIN 3 - BUSINESS 4 !!!
HEDGES JOB SAFE FOR ANOTHER TWO GAMES!!! FAMILY MAN LARKIN ARRESTED OVER INDECENT IMAGES!!! FARRER CAUGHT BY MATRON TURNING OFF HAGRIDS LIFE SUPPORT!!! NAYLOR TO STAR IN REMAKE OF THE INCREDIBLE SHRINKING MAN!!!
MANAGERS FAVE FILM EVER!!! - FILM RECOMMENDATION OF THE WEEK - INSOMNIA - starring Al Pacino as a cop in the perpetual daylight town of Nightmute, Alaska, on the trail of serial killer Robin Williams! 6 days without sleep leave him questioning reality in this psychological thriller about not losing your way!