At any one time in the UK it is estimated there are 3 to 4 serial killers living amongst us in plain sight!! Some are family doctors like Fred Shipman while others are artisan builders like Fred West!! And some are simple financial advisers like Carl Almond-Doherty! You heard it here first! Just think about it for a moment ?? What does any of us really know about Almond-Doherty other than the fact he cold calls vulnerable pensioners about their mis-sold PPI? Pensioners who mysteriously breathe their last shortly after signing their PPI refunds away!! Well today at the Toxteth Tiber Arena, Dr Death put away his syringes and deadly diamorphine to blend in to society, by running the game for The BSFC in a commanding display against the Sefton Power Rangers!!
Manager Hedges was left bereft of his whole backroom staff today after they entered precipitation lockdown! So it was left to the gaffers most loyal trusted leader on the pitch, Gary Bibsta Bibs to turn his Wenger ball philosophy into reality. Bibby and Digga combined so effortlessly in a passing masterclass down the right hand side tha the manger almost felt his stage 3 pneumonia was worth it. For 25 minutes The Class of 2020 played probly their best ticcy tacca football of their lives which culminated in a pullback from Bibs for Murray to arc first touch into the top corner of the net for a team goal tha will never be bettered!! Paul Murray retire now 3/9/2020!! Life will never get better than this!! Gary Bibby and the Elusive Ginga Pimpernel were the living embodiment of everything that is good about the Beautiful Game! Up front Ritchie Rich was like Professor Plum with the lead pipe in the conservatory, a blunt object but it does the job! His battling snarling performance fed Roberts to get his customary goal 2 - 0 Business!! Before half time The Rangers came back and Paul Muzza Murray tickled fattys ankles for him to go down for a penalty! HALF TIME: SPR 1 - BSFC 2!!
At half time The Golden Child Joe Birkett had to go home cos his mam had his tea on the table! ?? The Manager shuffled his pack and brought on Josh 90 at right back and the ever reliable pit pony Chiddy Chid Chidsta at left back! In riposte The Rangers brought on the 9 foot Child of Hale up front who along with the monsoon conditions caused us problems for the rest of the game! In midfield Ashley and Doherty now came into their own playing composed passing football while others were losing their heads! But the Rangers tricky trickster number 8 ghosted past Junior Naylor to set up his strike partner to head off the bar and then into the net! 2- 2!! Pressure was applied by the opposition but Will Jennings was more than equal to it. He saved with his legs and then with one hand and cooly clutched an attempted lob out of the air. The Aryan Race Ubermenschen had kept his team in the game yet again and was the non serial killer Man of the Match!! FULL TIME: SEFTON PARK RANGERS 2 - BUSINESS SCHOOL 2!!
STOP PRESS: MURPHY ARRESTED FOR MOLESTING A TURBOT IN THE BACK OF HIS VAN!! BIRKETT SENT TO BED EARLY FOR CALLING HIS STEPDAD SNOTTY!!! PPI CUSTOMER MRS GRUNDY FROM NUMBER 12 ACACIA AVENUE FOUND DEAD IN HER CHAIR WITH THE TV STILL ON!!!