Home league match played on 09 February 2017.
Kicked off at 7:00 PM

B.O.C.F.C Press Conference

20:17, February 9, 2017

B.O.C.F.C.H.Q., Battersea 

*The B.O.C President walks in to a flash of bulbs, a show of hands and a flurry of questions* 

Reporters: "Mr President! Mr President!" 

President: "Yes, you." [motions at one of the gathered reporters] 

Reporter #1: "What's your view on the recent run of bad results?"

President: "What bad results. We were magnificent tonight. Most shots on goal. Most shots on target. Most players. Most substitutions. Most goals." 

Reporter #1: "Well that's not correct, the opposition scored more goals than you. They won".

President: "WRONG. This year we have scored more goals than the opposition. Period!" 

Reporter #2: "What do you say to the claims that your team can't play cohesively, and can't hold on to possession?" 

President: "FAKE NEWS! My team and I are having talks. Very good talks. Great talks! And we're going to make this team great again. We already are great again. My team and I are going to put in place an opposition ban. We're going to ban the opposition from having the ball. You'll see! We will make this team great again. We are total winners!" 

Reporter #2: "You can't just ban the opposition..." 

President: "The security of our team is at stake. We must take back control of our territory. No more opposition infiltrating what's ours! MAKE BOC GREAT AGAIN!" 

Reporter #3: "How are you approaching the next game?" 

President: "We're going to build a wall. A great big defensive wall. All the defenders and midfielders will be in it, and maybe even the strikers too. It's going to be beautiful. And Harretons are going to pay for it. They have enough money. I will make them. It's going to be great." 

Reporter #4: "Can we talk about all the sitters your team missed tonight. There were at least half a dozen by my count." 

President: "We scored amazing goals. Terrific goals- 

Reporter #4: "I was talking about the missed sitters..." 

President: "Ilyas Pisirici scored two goals. Incredible goals-" 

Reporter #4: "They were fumbles by the keeper" 

President: "Alternative facts! Everyone that was there, and there were millions of people watching, they all said they were terrific goals, the best they had ever seen. It was the biggest and best crowd ever." 

Reporter #4: "No one was there" 

President: "Lies! FAKE NEWS! SAD! SEE YOU IN COURT!" 

*The B.O.C President storms out to a flurry of further unanswered questions*

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